There came a point in my life where I found I didn’t have time to take care of myself and do the things I loved. My coach helped me learn the power of saying yes and being very clear on what I was saying yes to.
I began working on asking myself a series of questions prior to saying yes to things both in my personal life and work life, rather than just quickly saying yes and figuring it out later (which is what I always use to do).
It is important to stop saying yes to things that are not serving you. When something comes up for me that I have to make a decision on, I ask myself …
Is this opportunity important to me? Does it excite me, or am I saying yes because I know it will make someone else happy?
Is this opportunity something that I have been looking for in my life?
When I look at my schedule, does adding this in feel good or increase my stress level?
Pausing to ask yourself these questions is very important. When we take the time to do this, we will find that our schedules are filled with things that bring us joy instead of things we think we are supposed to be doing.
Remember that every time you say yes to something or someone else, you are saying no to yourself. This is very important. I do not recommend being rude when saying no to people or telling your boss no because you do not like a project. There are some things in life we have to say yes to. However, there are A LOT of things in our lives that we say yes to that we do not have to.
I had a client who came to me saying she needed more energy. She was always tired. I helped her with some essential oils to support sleep and energy, but she was still tired so we dove in deeper. Turns out she really didn’t know how to say no. She was on every board, said yes to every classroom volunteer project, etc. but she never said yes to herself and she felt overwhelmed all the time. Through some work together, learning to pause before saying yes to things, she now feels empowered to say yes to herself first and say no without feeling guilty. She now has a schedule she can manage and feels like she can show up as the best version of herself each and every day.
You have to decide what your highest priorities are
and have the courage
— pleasantly, smilingly, non-apologetically –
to say ‘no’ to other things.
And the way to do that is by having a bigger ‘yes’ burning inside.
— Steven Covey
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