Bright Spot Network, For Families Living with Cancer

During my first pregnancy, I began to suffer from stomach pains but they were always fleeting. After the birth of my second baby, it was worse but explainable: I *just* had a baby. I was nursing. I was working full time. I was tired. My husband had been encouraging me to see my doctor but it all seemed so silly … after just having a baby, who didn’t feel unlike themselves?

My doctor ordered a number of tests, and then some more, and some more after that. Finally, I learned I had Stage III Colon Cancer. At 37 years old, with a 6-month -old and 3-year-old at home, I went through major surgery and 8 rounds of chemotherapy.

Cancer runs in my family. My mom died from breast cancer when she was 58. I had always assumed that I would eventually get breast cancer. Still, I thought of myself as healthy. I was smart, getting early mammograms and staying on top of new research. It never occurred to me that I would get cancer before 40 and that, of all places, it would be on my colon.

When my mom was first diagnosed, I was 16 years old, so I have some sense of what cancer can do to a family. And yet, those many months after diagnosis were impossibly hard and I am still grieving the precious time I lost with my young kids.

There are relatively few resources for young families wading through a cancer diagnosis. I am lucky for the foresight of a handful of healthcare professionals who connected me with other young people like myself. Those connections bred conversations about talking to kids about illness, but also our careers, our partners, and our questions for what a post-cancer-diagnosis-life might look like.

I am endlessly grateful for the conversations and connections. I know that Bright Spot Network will begin to fill the gap for other young people and their families.

Aimee Barnes
Co-Founder and Board President
[email protected]

In September 2018, I was diagnosed with breast cancer while 38 weeks pregnant. I was 36 years old and had a four-year-old son. My daughter

was born the day after I received my diagnosis. My husband and I were completely blindsided. I had no family history of cancer and had always been in good health.

During my pregnancy, I had day-dreamed about all the things I would do with my daughter during my maternity leave. Instead, that time was used for 16 rounds of chemotherapy, a mastectomy, and five weeks of radiation.

The path of treatment was incredibly difficult – physically, psychologically, emotionally – both for me and my family. I often felt robbed of precious time during my children’s earliest days – time that would have felt fleeting even under normal circumstances.

Because a cancer diagnosis is relatively uncommon among young parents, there are few resources available to support us. I found that many of the resources that did exist were targeted at people 15-20 years my senior, and those targeted at the “younger crowd” generally didn’t account for the additional challenges presented by navigating a cancer diagnosis with small children.

Through informal introductions by my doctors and friends, I was able to connect with other young parents who were facing similar cancer diagnoses, creating a critical support system. We often discussed this feeling of lost time, as well as a lack of cancer resources available for people like us – young and with small children. And we dreamed about the things we would do, the trips we would take, and the time we would spend with our kids and partners when we finished our treatment.